Then they both burst out laughing and said " Mum you only have 1 friend!" I must say that sounded a bit depressing when I realized they were right!
Moving to a new country is never the easiet thing for a wife or even the kids to cope with in the area of making friends.
The curse of being an expat wife or kid.... all your friends are transient! Sad to say but its true... everyone is here either for short term or long term, unless your blessed to have some local nationals for friends (but then you are transient friends to them) So you are always saying goodbye or starting afresh with someone else you have just met.
The husband or partner always have it easy in this department i found. They just simply immerse themselves into their work and the thought of making friends doesnt seem to concern them as much as it does us. The kids struggle for the first couple of weeks or months (some even the first year) trying to settle and find replacements for the friends they left behind.
I learnt though after a few years of living in Phnom Penh that even though i was tired of investing time and effort into my expat friends, in the long run it was well worth the effort!
I knew I was going to leave one day and they knew they too were going to leave as well. It was in me to make friends, call me needy but I liked meeting new people from different cultures. I think it was out of fear of going on that emotional rollercoaster of saying goodbye over and over again that it made me think what was the use of making friends, if I was only going to say goodbye to them in a week, month or year/s.
So to finish up this post I will say that it was well worth the effort to invest and make friends while we were living in Phnom Penh. I dont think I would have the same appreciation for other cultures including my own if i didnt experience that.
Plus side to it all is that you will have the oppurtunity to visit so many different countries that you wouldnt normally go to, but now you can visit those great people that you met as an expat.
Plus side for our kids is that they grew to have a world view on life, they can now see that life doesnt only happen in their own backyard (country). They also have this weird appreciation and patience for other asian kids. Why, because they finally have an understanding of why asians do what they do! No text book can teach them that!
Where would I be without all the great friends I made in Cambodia, it makes me sad just thinking about them all and how much I miss them already. We are truly greatful that we surrounded ourselves with people who found it in their lives to invest in us.
So.... I may only have 1 friend in Jakarta (according to my daughters, they said the guest services guy at the Ascott doesnt count!) I look forward to making new ones!
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